1. FORMER CHILD ACTOR COREY HAIM DIES. MEMORABILIA SITE DONATE $20,000 TOWARDS COST OF FUNERAL.
2. NCAA BASKETBALL TOURNAMENT.
3. IN CALIFORNIA, ROBBER ROBS 11, NETS 6 DOLLARS.
4. CHARLIE SHEEN PLEADS NOT GUILTY TO DOMESTIC ASSAULT CHARGES (ALLEGEDLY HELD KNIFE TO WIFE'S THROAT ON CHRISTMAS DAY).
5. RUNAWAY PRIUS-- FACT OR FICTION?
6. WATCH MADE FROM DINOSAUR DUNG TO SELL FOR $11,290.
7. KATE WINSLET TO SPLIT FROM HUSBAND SAM MENDES.
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5 comments:
So tell me now, have you yet heard
Of the watch made of dinosaur turd?
It looks great on your hand
But for almost twelve grand
With a price tag like that it's absurd!
(like it's not absurd to wear dino-crap on your wrist whatever the price?)
IF YOU WISH TO BE TAKEN FOR A SAP,
THEN FEEL FREE TO FALL INTO THIS TRAP.
A ROLEX IT WAS NOT,
FOR 12 THOU, THIS YOU GOT,
A WATCH THAT LITERALLY IS JUST A PIECE OF CRAP.
THE ECONOMY, IT IS BAD, SO THEY SAY,
UNEMPLOYMENT, IT'S GROWING, DAY BY DAY.
BUT ROB ELEVEN AND NET 6 DOLLARS?
YOU DON'T NEED LOTS OF SCHOLARS,
TO CONCLUDE THAT CRIME REALLY DOESN'T PAY.
THE ILLINI, THEIR PLAY WAS JUST ILL.
NO BIG DANCE--FOR ME--BITTER PILL.
I'M NOT ORANGE, JUST BLUE.
AND I SAY TO YOU,
NIT TOURNEY IS REALLY NO THRILL.
Until now it has been under wraps
(prob'ly 'cause we all could give two craps.)
But when 'Becca came 'round
Sam and Kate's love went down
like the rest...a "Titanic" collapse!
He he - couldn't resist that one.
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