1. THE ELIOT SPITZER SAGA.
2. IN NESS CITY KANSAS, LADY FREED FROM TOILET SHE HAD BEEN SITTING ON FOR TWO YEARS.
3. GWYNETH PALTROW HAS LETTER C TATTOOED TO HER RIGHT THIGH (IN HONOR OF HER HUSBAND).
4. BILLY CRYSTAL PLAYS FOR YANKEES FOR ONE DAY.
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The poor woman just sat down to pee;
didn't know that two years later she
would be stuck to the seat;
there, her guests she would greet
Said she, could I be more lazy?
It was a lifelong dream come true
For a famous New York City Jew
He got to play as a Yankee
It's too bad that when he
struck out, his chances he blew.
A tattoo won't make a man stay
Especially if said man is gay
With a voice so high
Like Ms Paltrow's guy
In fact, it might drive him away
A governor was known for his prosecution
of Wall Street excesses, vice and prostitution.
He hired a chippy
to service his bippy,
but found this career move led to dissolution.
Ode to the Ang Lee (Brokeback Mountain) movie version of governor-gate:
While a governor, Eliot Spitzer
had a brief extra-marital spritzer.
Her fees were so high
that he'd often cry,
"I wish that I knew how to quits'r!"
In the Emporer's Club, Spitzer was Client 9.
Now to his rescue rides Benjamin Stein.
"Don't quit or confess!"
"Blame the I R S!"
To err's only human, to evade is devine.
Ex-governor Eliot Spitzer,
was offered, "Would you like some tit, sir?".
After boinking the floozie
& making the news, he
dun flushed his career doen the shitzer.
Hypocrisy's hard on the family life
of Eliot Spitzer, who cheats on his wife.
Now he cowers with dread
when retiring to bed,
& keeps one eye open, lest she bring a knife.
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